February

Couples Therapy 

Workbook for Healing

Emotionally Focused Therapy Techniques to Restore Your Relationship

By: Lori Cluff Schade, PhD, LMFT

This workbook is a helpful tool for couples seeking to improve their communication, emotional connection, and overall relationship satisfaction. However, it’s not a magic fix and shouldn’t be viewed as a replacement for professional therapy, especially for complex issues. Couples willing to put in the effort and open to exploring their emotional needs might find it a valuable resource for strengthening their relationship.

Strengths:

• Grounded in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT): The workbook uses EFT principles, a well-established and research-backed approach to couples therapy.
• Structured and accessible: The workbook provides clear instructions, exercises, and worksheets, making it easy for couples to follow and complete independently.
• Focus on emotional needs: It helps couples identify and understand their underlying emotional needs and express them effectively to each other.
• Promotes communication and connection: The exercises encourage open communication, empathy, and emotional vulnerability, fostering deeper connection.
• Affordable alternative to therapy: For couples hesitant or unable to afford therapy, this workbook can offer valuable guidance and tools.

Weaknesses:

• Not a substitute for professional therapy: While helpful, the workbook can’t replace the support and expertise of a trained therapist, especially for complex issues.
• Requires commitment and effort: Both partners need to be invested and willing to put in the time and effort to complete the exercises effectively.
• Limited scope: Primarily focuses on communication and emotional connection, not addressing broader relationship issues like power dynamics or individual growth. 

If you and your partner are wanting to dive deeper into creating a healthier relationship, this book may be a great book for you. However, if serious issues are happening, include divorce, separation, abuse, addiction, or infidelity, please reach out to our office to schedule an appointment before beginning this book. 

Be Courageous!

Jeri Kay

January

Reclaiming Pleasure

A Sex Positive Guide for Moving Past Sexual Trauma & Living a Passionate Life

By: Holly Richmond, PhD

“YOUR SEXUAL TRAUMA DOESN’T INFORM YOUR SEXUALITY; IT MISINFORMS IT.”

If you have a past that includes sexual abuse, sexual harassment, rape or assault, it is highly possible that you have disengaged from your sexuality. In this book, you will find a compassionate voice that recognizes your hurt and possible shame and offers practical advice and strategies to let go of your trauma and take hold of safety in your body and learn to experience sexual desire.  Healing from sexual trauma starts in the body- this book helps you to recognize inaccuracies you may have developed as you relate to your body and your biology. As we heal our body from the pain and hurt it has experienced, and survived, we can begin to heal our emotions and change our thoughts. The author speaks gently and honestly, with encouragement and clarity. She seeks to help her readers eliminate the shame that comes with sexual trauma and replace it with truth and wisdom. If you are struggling with your sexuality, this is the book for you. Enjoy!

Be Courageous!

Jeri Kay

December

Mating in Captivity

Unlocking Erotic Intelligence

By: Esther Perel

First of all, let’s just appreciate the creativity of that title, right?! This is my first Esther Perel book to read, and I can definitely say I was not disappointed. Perel is able to look at things from a different perspective, and this is refreshing if you are tired of reading relationship books that basically say the same thing over and over. 

Esther Perel, a renowned couples therapist, dives deep into the paradox of maintaining passion and security within committed relationships. She challenges conventional wisdom about long-term love, arguing that the quest for stability often contradicts the spark of desire.

Drawing on decades of experience, Perel explores how the merging of lives in committed partnerships can lead to dwindling sexual desire. She argues that embracing “erotic distance” within a relationship – fostering individual identity and maintaining a sense of mystery – is crucial for reigniting passion.

Key themes explored include:

• The tension between security and desire in monogamous relationships.
• The impact of domesticity and routine on passion.
• The exploration of individual vs. shared identity within a couple.
• The role of “otherness” and the “unknown” in fueling eroticism.
• Navigating infidelity in a nuanced and non-judgmental way.

Perel doesn’t shy away from controversial topics, discussing infidelity as a potential expression of unmet needs rather than solely a moral failing. She challenges readers to redefine their expectations of long-term love and embrace the complexity of desire within the confines of commitment.

Mating in Captivity is not a self-help guide with quick fixes, but rather a thought-provoking journey into the often-conflicting forces that shape intimacy and desire in our most important relationships.

Be Courageous!

Jeri Kay

November

Self-Love Journal for Teen Girls

By: Teen Thrive

The Self Love Journal for Teen Girls by Teen Thrive aims to empower teen girls by guiding them through self-discovery and self-acceptance. Filled with fun and engaging exercises, it encourages exploring strengths, weaknesses, emotions, and goals. By fostering positive self-esteem and healthy self-care practices, the journal helps navigate the challenges of teen life with confidence and compassion. This is not the typical cheesy workbook made for teens. Teen Thrive truly knows how to make their books exciting and interesting to their audience. Honestly, I purchased a copy of this book for myself, and I have encouraged several of my adult clients to get a copy to work through, as well. Truly, I have copies of all the materials Teen Thrive has developed, and I haven’t been disappointed with any of them. Great gift for a teen girl in your life, and even for adult women. Enjoy!

Be Courageous!

Jeri Kay

October

Best Self Intimacy Deck

Do a few of these cards over dinner, on date night, or even in bed before the lights go out. 

It only takes a few minutes to create opportunities to deepen connection and these cards are a great conduit!

Be Courageous!

Jeri Kay

September

The New Male Sexuality

By Bernie Zilbergeld, Ph.D.

Last month, I introduced a book on female anatomy and understanding. This month, I would like to introduce The New Male Sexuality. Now, this book isn’t really NEW new, but it has great information to gain an understanding of the complexities of male anatomy, as well as helpful information to understand the changes that may occur in male anatomy due to stress, age, health issues and more. 

This book will also help you understand desire and arousal to help you and your partner. It will also clarify what realistic sex looks like, as opposed to the myth we are sold by society, social media, and the porn industry. 

If you are wanting to understand your body and what it can do for you and your partner, this is the book to read!

Be Courageous!

Jeri Kay

August

The more I work with women in my office, the more I understand that women, for the most part, know very little about their “lady bits” and are very hesitant to talk about issues they may be having “down there”. 

As we learn and understand our anatomy and all that comes with our femaleness, we are better able to communicate and get what we need (and want!). 

This book is a great reference for any questions you might have, and it’s perfect for men to read to understand more about female anatomy. When you know and understand the female body, you can’t help but admire and appreciate it more.

Be Courageous!

Jeri Kay

July

Living with Your Selves

By Sandra J. Hocking and Company

“Living with Your Selves” is a self-help book written for people with dissociative identity disorder (DID), formerly known as multiple personality disorder (MPD). The book is written by Sandra J. Hocking, who has DID herself, and her daughter, Phoenix J. Hocking.

The book provides an overview of DID, including its symptoms, causes, and treatment options. It also discusses the challenges of living with DID, such as memory loss, identity confusion, and relationship problems.

The book offers a variety of coping strategies for people with DID, such as journaling, relaxation techniques, and assertiveness training. It also provides guidance on how to find a therapist who is experienced in treating DID.

“Living with Your Selves” is a comprehensive and informative resource for people with DID. It is written in a clear and easy-to-understand style, and it offers practical advice that can help people with DID to live more fulfilling lives.

If you are interested in learning more about DID or if you are struggling to cope with the disorder, I highly recommend reading “Living with Your Selves.” It is a valuable resource that can help you to live a more fulfilling life.

If you have DID, or you think you may, please reach out to our office to schedule an appointment. It is important to be working with someone who has expertise in dissociative disorders. 

Be Courageous!

Jeri Kay 

June

How to Keep House While Drowning

By KC Davis

Do you struggle to get your 20 loads of laundry done? 

Is it difficult to maintain your hygiene? Brushing teeth? Showering? Using deodorant?

Have you slept on the same bed sheets for 6 months because it’s just too dang hard to change them?

Does your car look like you live in it?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, this is the book for you! 

KC Davis is a licensed professional counselor that has experience working with individuals struggling to maintain various daily living skills because of mental health issues. Her book gives quick, bite-size solutions that can help prevent the endless cycle of guilt/shame and blaming that can occur when the day and it’s chores feel overwhelming. 

Be Courageous!

Jeri Kay

May

The Verbally Abusive Relationship

By Patricia Evans

I have found that most people who come to my office and are in the midst of a verbally abusive relationship have no idea they are experiencing abuse. That is why I like this book- The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans is a groundbreaking book that provides a comprehensive overview of the dynamics of verbal abuse. 

Evans defines verbal abuse as “any behavior that is used to control, manipulate, or intimidate another person through the use of words.” She goes on to identify a number of different types of verbal abuse, including name-calling, put-downs, threats, and silent treatment.

The book is divided into three parts. The first part provides an overview of verbal abuse, including its definition, types, and effects. The second part offers strategies for recognizing and responding to verbal abuse. The third part provides resources for help and support.

If you have experienced silent treatments, verbal assaults, hurtful sarcasm or other hurtful words, read this book and learn what you can do to stop the behaviors and find support in the midst of the pain. Be Courageous!

                                    -Jeri Kay

April

The Meaning of Marriage

By Timothy Keller with Kathy Keller

“Marriage has the power of truth, the ability to reveal to you who you really are, with all your flaws. How wonderful that it also has the “power of love”- an unmatched power to affirm you and heal you of the deepest wounds and hurts of your life…” (page 162). 

In his book, Timothy Keller teaches what a truly deep and fulfilling marriage can be- allowing both individuals to experience hope, healing, friendship and intimacy. 

If you are already married, and want to deepen your connection, The Meaning of Marriage will bring insight and opportunities to love and embrace your spouse. 

If you are single, this book will help you know how to prepare and develop yourself in order to be the best partner for your future spouse. You will also begin to understand what to watch for as you date and develop a relationship that may lead to marriage. 

This is not an easy read. It will take a while to read this book- take your time. Chew on what you read and work to implement the suggestions. This book is one to read over and over in order to grasp its depth of insight. Be courageous!

-Jeri Kay

March

Date or Soulmate? How to Know if Someone is Worth Pursuing in Two Dates or Less

By Neil Clark Warren, PhD

The dating world can be brutal. It can be confusing. It can be heartbreaking. So, when someone offered me their old tattered version of this book, I skimmed through it and it changed my outlook on dating. I began to realize that I had power to find the type of person I wanted and needed in my life. This book helps in figuring out what are you “musts” and your “deal breakers”. It also teaches you how to steer away from certain types that are only going to cause trouble. I’ve recommended this book to multiple clients who have said it narrowed down their focus so they felt more in control of the dating process. If you are single or divorced, and ready to start dating again, check out this book. Be Courageous!

-Jeri Kay

February

Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents 

By Lindsay C. Gibson, PsyD

Sometimes, parents don’t have the capacity to provide security and stability to their children. How does this impact the child once they reach adulthood? This book is not a book that bashes parents- you won’t find a million new reasons to blame your parents for your issues. What you will find is a compassionate explanation of how adult children struggle with the hurts that are a result of parents who weren’t able to give their children what they needed. You will walk away from this book having greater insight into why you do some of the things you do, as well as, new tools to help you navigate the sometimes rocky terrain of adult child and parent relationships.

-Jeri Kay

Amazon Link

January

Necessary Endings by Dr. Henry Cloud

Let’s be honest, most of us fret over having to end something. Ending a relationship. Leaving the job. No longer volunteering. Endings are hard and most definitely uncomfortable.

In Dr. Cloud’s book, Necessary Endings, we learn to view endings as a necessity for something new to begin. We find out that opportunities occur because we decided to end something else. If you are ready to “end” something, or you want to find the courage to do it, check out his book and let me know what you think!

-Jeri Kay

Amazon Link